“No, me do it!”

A bazillion times a day, my determined two-year-old squeals at me, “No! Me do it! Me do it!” Usually followed by him aggressively shoving away my hand. Hurriedly reaching for an object. Or flailing his arms in a panic. His world. Is. Ending.

I let out the dogs, forgetting that’s Jack’s task and he dramatically throws himself to the floor. Tantruming for fifteen minutes.  Is this just my severely independent son? Or do all toddlers go through the “I can do everything myself” stage?

Whatever the answer, Jack’s philosophy that he can do everything resembles a teenager who knows everything. So how do I tell a bull-headed toddler that he literally can’t turn on the stove, open the pickle jar or get the mail?

I don’t.

What I’ve realized is that the more you tell Jack he can’t, the more he wants to do. Instead, I let him try. When he realizes he can’t squeeze the toothpaste out, he looks up. “It’s too hard,” he begrudgingly notes. “Need help.” Dissatisfaction in his tone.

And when he wants to unload the groceries? Why not? So he carries one bag of bread. Then the crackers. Then one cheese. Drops the juice. Then finds the popsicles and asks for one. He’s helping. And sure proud. It's colored all over his face.

The tricky part comes when his legs are in the air, back on the floor and I’m cleaning a particularly gooey mess from his bottom. “Me wipe it! Me wipe it!” Big sigh here. Instead of letting him get poo hands I respond, “How about I finish what I’m doing, then you can wipe it when you stand up and throw it in the toilet!” Notice the explanation point. Seems anytime I talk with enthusiasm it does the trick.

So, a few things I’ve learned when coping with the I’m-very-independent stage:

1. If it’s possible, let them try.

2. When they let you help, get in and get out. Minimal assistance needed here.

3. Give them their own chores. For example, Jack now helps Dad feed the dogs, puts the bowls away and lets them outside in the morning and evenings.

4. Always let them help, even if it takes all day.

5. Get creative. If they can’t do it themselves, think of something they can and challenge them to it.

6. Distract. When I’m about to breastfeed Ella, which he thinks he can do (seriously, lifts up his shirt and says, “No, me feed Ella”), I’ll ask him to get some books and read to us. Or we’ll read together. Totally forgets he thought he could lactate.

7. Realize they may actually be able to do it. It’s hard, but sometimes they may surprise you.

8. And finally, praise. Nothing shouts your love more than hugs and kisses following a independent, completed task.

Jack cutting, decorating and baking Christmas cookies with Nonnie S.

A Backpack Built to Last a Toddler

Our little bubble world pops next week. Jack returns to preschool two days a week. He’s expressed his reluctance lately, but that’s a whole entirely separate blog post. As I packed my lunch, poured the coffee and lugged out my breast pump this morning, I realized next week I’ll start packing double time.

As I eased back to work, my Mom’s been manning the kids three days a week. But, next week we start our regular schedule, which means packing up Jack’s lunch, diapers, wipes, extra clothes, extra underwear, nap blanket & sheet, coat, boots, snow pants, hat and mittens for daycare. If I miss anything, I get a note. And yes, the kids go outside every day. Even in the snow.

Kelty packpack similiar to Jack's
(Photo from Kelty)

Last winter was his first in daycare, and I realized most parents packed all the toddler/preschool nonsense in Meijer bags. I didn’t want to get lost in the mix, so we needed something different. On a regular trip to Target, my husband – perusing the outdoor section as always – discovered a Kelty adult backpack on sale for $20. Kelty packs are typically $60 - $200, so we basically stole it. Now I’m not saying all kids need a Kelty. But the price was right, and the brand was durable. Built to last a toddler.

Now a year later, I’ve realized how ah-mazing the backpack is. Jack uses the backpack when he sleeps over at his Nonna’s house. Goes on vacation. Long car rides. Day trips. Or basically any activity that includes leaving the house.

It’s trendy. Has multiple pockets. Tough. And seriously the perfect bag for the little person with so much to carry.

A Twist on Date Night

I can’t remember the last time the hubs and I had dinner out. My birthday in August maybe? And now a nuts-o toddler and nursing baby sure remove romance from any date night. Desperate to keep the family alive – and Jack’s mind off my return to work – I was inspired to have a family “Date Night In” tonight.

First, create the ambiance. All of us are half Italian. So, little Italy it was. I collected all the candles from our house for the centerpiece. Pulled out Jack’s roll paper and covered the table. Added crayons for doodling. Perfetto! Just 15 minutes of prep and we were on a date.

 Second, the menu. I’d been wanting to try Bertolli’s Frozen Meal Soups, so what better than our family date night? I picked up a bag of Tomato Florentine & Tortellini with Chicken while at Target shopping with Ella today. That way I had time to enjoy a bit of coloring by candlelight with my boys while soup cooked on the stove.

It was delish. Tasted so fresh. And seriously filling.

Third, and finally, enjoy. Jack melted some crayon. Justin took his coloring a little too seriously. Ella smiled at the atmosphere. And I couldn’t stop snapping photos, anxious to catch the first of many “Family Date Night Ins.”

Next up, we visit Germany. The other half of our ancestry.

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This post was inspired by Bertolli, who compensated me to participate in the Weeknight Meal Special Challenge. Check out Bertolli on Facebook or Twitter.